Broken open
by alli444
Summary: oneshot- Spencer starts taking dilaudid again after Emily died. Morgan notices something wrong and tries to help.


Spencer Reid slowly slid the needle into his arm, the dilaudid entering his bloodstream. He sighed, pulling it out, the stress had gotten so bad after Emily had died he just couldn't take much more of it. He had told himself it would only be one time, to ease a bit of the pain. But that was four times ago. Spencer knew that people were noticing his change in behavior; of course Morgan always had to be on his case. He was one of his friends and of course he was worried, but sometimes Reid really wanted to tell him to mind his own damn business. He lay down in his bed falling into a sleep plagued with nightmares.

When his alarm rang the next morning he slowly turned it off. Spencer rubbed at his forehead, sensing a headache coming. He pulled himself out of bed and stepped into his small bathroom. After showering and dressing he got his things together, not without slipping a vile of dilaudid in his messenger bag.

When he entered the BAU everything was fine until he sat down at his desk. He was told that Hotch wanted to speak with him. Reid stood up, feeling a bit dizzy. He knocked on the door then pushed it open.

"You wanted to talk to me?" Reid asked his eyes glancing around the room nervously. "Yes, sit down." Reid sat down looking at Hotch, but those eyes kept staring at him, making him uncomfortable. "Reid, you have been very distant lately and I wanted to know if there's anything you need to talk about." "Oh…" Spencer was relived that Hotch didn't notice, but at the same time a bit sad.

"What is Reid doing in Hotch's office?" Morgan asked as he sat down at his desk. "Hotch wanted to speak with him." JJ replied. Morgan could see a bit through the blinds and by the looks of it Reid looked incredibly nervous. He knew not to profile his teammates but something was definitely wrong with the kid.

Once Reid returned to his desk Morgan immediately approached him. "Hey Reid, what was that with Hotch?" "Oh, it was nothing." Morgan could see the kid was obviously lying. He looked nervous and there was light sweat on his face. Morgan decided to leave it alone and went back to his desk. Reid pulled out some reports and started on them, seeing that they didn't have a case today.

Morgan watched as Reid's hand shook went he wrote and he kept rubbing his forehead as if he had a headache. By the end of the day they all said goodbye Morgan invited Reid to hang out with him. Of course Reid politely declined, but something was definitely up with the kid. When he approached Hotch about it he was told it was a private matter.

By the time he had gotten home Reid was trembling so badly, he needed it so bad. He kicked off his shoes and walked to his bedroom. He opened the drawer and pulled out a clean syringe and a vile of dilaudid. After filling it up he quickly injected it waiting for it to start affecting him. As soon as it started he felt so much better. Everything just cleared up and he could sleep peacefully now.

The next few weeks went by the same and Morgan was growing increasingly worried at Reid's behavior. If Gideon were there he would know just what to do with the kid. Morgan looked up from his work he could see the kids eyes closing he was so tired, Reid dropped the pen from his hand startling him awake. Morgan would have thought it funny if not for the situation. Morgan got up heading to Hotch's office.

"Yes Morgan what is it?" Hotch asked at his arrival. "Reid is too sick to be working he can barley keep his eyes open." Hotch sighed at this. "I told him he could have some time off if he needed but he refused." "The kid is stubborn but I think its time someone stepped in." "Yes I believe so. Morgan I want you to take him home and find out what the problem is." "Me? Isn't that better for JJ or Garcia or something?" "No Morgan, I think he really looks up to you and you're a good influence on him." "Well alright. How many days are you giving me?" "Just call me when you get to the bottom of the problem."

With that Morgan exited the office going over to his desk packing his things and then walking over to Reid. The kid was asleep again, this time his head was on the desk and he was out. "Hey pretty boy, wake up." Morgan said shaking his younger teammate. Reid barley moved, but he managed to sit up after a minute. "Come on kid I'm taking you home." Reid was so out of it he let Morgan help him up get his stuff for him.

Once they got out to the car Morgan got Reid into the passenger seat and buckled him in. Morgan knew where Reid lived so its not like he needed directions. By the time they had driven to his apartment and got up to the door Reid was a lot more aware then he had been. The kid was walking by himself and took the key out opening the door.

"Thanks Morgan. I'll be fine now." Reid told him politely. "Not so fast pretty boy. I'm staying here with you for a few days. You're obviously sick and what kind of teammate would I be if I left you alone?" "Well…" "That was a rhetorical question kid. Now go change and get some sleep I'll make you something to eat." Morgan heard Reid mutter something about not being hungry. "You're like a stick, I'm making food whether you like it or not."

When Reid entered his bedroom his craving came back, just being in the same room as the drug made him crave. But Morgan was here; he could not shoot up with an FBI agent in his apartment. Well he was also an FBI agent so it was a bit weird. Reid sat on his bed and removed his shoes and socks. He then pulled off his sweater tossing it in the hamper. The young agent then glanced again at the drawer; Morgan was probably in the kitchen and would be there for a while. Reid brushed the sweaty hair out of his face, he felt like crap and it was just horrible. He opened the drawer, he had to do this fast. He filled up the syringe and rolled up his sleeve. Track marks covered his arm where had previously injected. Reid slid the needle into his arm and began to push down letting the drug back into his system. He did not hear the door open or Morgan call his name all he felt was the drug in his body.

Reid jumped when he felt a firm hand around his wrist. Spencer pulled the needle out scared of looking into Morgan's eyes. "Reid? Reid look at me." Spencer felt tears in his eyes then fall down his face. He looked at Morgan who was holding his hand out for the syringe. Reid placed it in his hand gently. "Reid I need the rest of it." The boy was shaking so badly now, tears were dripping down his face. "I…can't." His voice cracked.

"Shh calm down." Morgan held the boy gently getting him to lie down. Reid was crying so badly his body was shivering as though he was cold. "In…the dr..drawer." Spencer whispered. Morgan opened the drawer next to the bed finding what he was looking for. Reid had fallen asleep by the looks of it. He knew Reid had a problem but this was bad. The amount of empty vials was too much for his liking. How much was the kid taking. It looked like he was almost out anyway. He wondered who in hell would sell drugs to an FBI agent?

Morgan knew that Reid had gotten over his addiction a long time ago; it had been years since the Hankel case. What had caused this? Then he realized it, Emily. The poor kid was so overwhelmed by her death he didn't know what to do. Morgan pulled his cell out of his pocket pressing the speed dial for Hotch.

"_Morgan? How is he?" _ "Not good Hotch…the kids using again." _"Damn I thought he had gotten over that?" _ "Me too. He had a panic attack when I found him. He just looked so broken." _"Did you take it all?" _"Yeah, there was a lot of it. Mostly empty though." _"Well you get him better okay." _"Don't worry I will. See you." _"Bye."  
_

Morgan looked down at his sleeping friend. How could he not of suspected this. Of course he knew something was off, but this was something he never thought of. Reid turned over in his sleep groaning softly. Morgan sighed, Reid needed to get changed and maybe a bath. The kid was just a mess.

Morgan shook him gently making the boy open his eyes. "Hey I'm going to run you a bath okay?" Reid looked up at him. Morgan felt his head the kid was burning up. "I'm…tired." His voice sounded so weak. "Yeah, I know. This will help with the fever."

Morgan walked into the adjoing bathroom and knelt down by the tub, turning the water on cool so it would help with Reid's fever. After the tub was filled he stepped out of the bathroom back into Reid's bedroom. The kid was fast asleep and Morgan felt so guilty for this. He was always in pain and never let anyone in, he knew the kid was absolutely terrified of inheriting schizophrenia and the drug use was not helping the cause.

He gently shook the boy's shoulder trying to get him to wake up. "Hey Reid…Spencer wake up." this made his eyes open a bit. "Come on I got your bath ready." Reid made no move to even try and get up. "Come on kid, don't be stubborn." But Reid was so out of it from the fever he had no idea what the hell Derek was saying.

Morgan pulled him up into his arms; Spencer just lay limp against his chest, his body too weak to move. Morgan sighed picking him up into his arms, Reid was lighter than he had expected. He entered the bathroom setting Spencer down on the floor. Morgan unbuttoned his shirt pulling it off and then the same with the kids pants and underwear. If Reid wasn't so out of it Morgan knew how embarrassed he would be. The kid was so self conscious it wasn't even funny. Not like the kid was ugly, in fact he was very attractive in his mind. Not like Reid would return the feelings. He then got Reid into the tub and began using a washcloth to clean the sweat and dirt from his body. After that he poured the shampoo into his hand then began rubbing it through Reid's messy hair. After finishing Morgan dried him off looking concerned about the track marks in his friends arm.

Once Reid was on the bed Morgan pulled a t-shirt and sweatpants and boxers out of Reid's dresser. He brought them back over and began helping the kid dress. "Morgan?" Reid whispered hoarsely. "Yeah, what's up?" "I don't feel good." He whimpered softly. "Spencer, shh. Don't cry. You're going to be fine." "You called me Spencer?" He whispered again. Morgan had not realized it but he did. "Yeah, is that okay?" "My mom calls me that." His voice was cracking; tears were running down his face. "Shh, Spencer just go to sleep you'll feel better soon." Reid lay against him till he fell asleep and then was laid back down and put under the covers.

Derek stood up, looking down sadly at his broken teammate. He left the door open a bit in case Spencer woke up. Morgan's cell began to ring, he looked down finding it was JJ he answered it. "Hey." _"What happened? Hotch said that you took Reid home." _ "He wasn't feeling well and Hotch told me to look out for him." _"Morgan you know he has been looking like hell for weeks." _ "Well I got him to talk to me." _"That's great, what's wrong?" _ "Look JJ, its not stuff I should be talking about. Reid wouldn't want that." _"Reid is my teammate also if you've forgotten. I have every right to know!" _ "He's using again." _"What? Are you sure?" _"Of course I'm sure I walked in on the kid shooting up!" _"Why would he do that if you were in the house?" _"God JJ. I have no idea. He just looked so broken. He started crying when I tried to take it away, he's so dependent on it now." _"What do you think started this again?" _" I think it has to do with Emily." _"What? Are you sure? Geez this is bad." _"I think we already know that." He replied sarcastically. _"She's alive." _"What! That's not funny JJ. You know how much Reid's been suffering!" _"I wasn't allowed to tell." _"Shit!" Morgan growled punching the pillow laying next to him. _"I'll tell Hotch your suspicion. Bye Morgan." _Then she was gone.

Morgan was so pissed now, how could they do that to Reid! He had been close with Prentiss. Morgan entered the bedroom again to find Reid looking through his drawer for the drugs he had recently disposed of. By the looks of it the kid was starting to feel withdrawals and was shaking so harshly.

"Spencer!" The boy stopped suddenly looking at Morgan; there were tears in his eyes. He sat down on the bed holding his head tightly then he felt Morgan sit next to him embracing him gently. "It…hur..hurts." He cried into Morgan's chest in obvious agony. The two sat there for a while till Spencer had calmed down. "What happened Spence? I thought you were asleep?" "I had a nightmare." His voice sounded so broken. "Please…I just need a little, to help me sleep."

Morgan was shocked; Spencer Reid was begging him for drugs. "Spence, you can't just give into your cravings so easily like that. What would Gideon say about this?" "I…can't help it." The young man whispered. It just broke Derek's heart to see his best friend like this. Derek brushed the hair out of Reid's face, seeing the tears in his eyes running freely.

When Morgan stood up he had thought that Spencer had fallen back to sleep. But Spencer was clutching to his pant leg the minute he had stood. "Please…don't leave." He whispered. "Hey, it's alright kid. I'm just going to go get us some dinner from the kitchen." When Morgan left Reid had begun to feel very dizzy. He clutched on the sheets, he felt like he was on fire. "Morgan?" He called out weakly. The room seemed to be spinning and he felt nauseous. "You okay Reid." He heard Morgan's voice. "My stomach hurts." He whimpered. "You going to be sick?" Spencer just nodded weakly.

Derek helped him into the bathroom; Reid could feel Derek holding his hair back when he threw up. The pain was just getting worse and his head was killing him. Then he felt a cool cloth on his heated face. "Come on Spencer lets get you back to bed." Morgan's voice said in the distance. After lying back down on the bed Morgan had brought him some water and helped him drink a little than helped him lie back down.

Morgan looked up when he heard someone knocking on the door. He muttered that he'd be right back. When he answered it he was surprised to see Hotch there. "Hey. Come in." The older man stepped in the apartment looking around before turning back to Morgan. "How is he?" The man looked very stressed and concerned. "He's having bad withdrawals." Morgan sighed. "Can I see him?" "Yeah I guess I didn't know you needed my permission." The two entered the bedroom quietly. Reid lay on his side under the blanket apparently asleep. Hotch walked over to him crouching down next to him, he gently touched his forehead. "He's burning up."

Spencer whimpered when he felt someone touch him. His eyes opened and he could see the blurry outline of someone there. "Morgan?" He rasped. "I'm right here Spencer, Hotch stopped by to see how you were feeling." Spencer was shaking again the pain in his eyes was so visible. Hotch felt so guilty it made him sick; he gently brushed the dark hair out of his subordinate's face. He then gently rubbed Reid's back to calm him down making Spencer fall back asleep after a few minutes.

"How'd you do that?" Morgan asked amazed. "It takes me forever to get him to sleep." Hotch smiled a bit at this. "It helps when you have a kid. You know how to make them sleep when their sick." The man sighed. "It was worse then I had thought." "Is it true about Prentiss?" Morgan asked bitterly. Hotch looked surprised but then replied with a quiet yes. "I swear if she's the reason that Reid started again I am going to kill someone." "Blame Strauss, I wanted to let you guys know. But she didn't think you'd keep it quiet." "Then what the hell was all that grief counseling for then!" "No damn idea. But I could tell Reid was devastated but I would have never thought he would return back to this." Hotch sighed shaking his head. "Last time Gideon helped him out but now I think he needs you Morgan." "How do you know?" "Didn't you hear the way he called out for you? That was obvious he trusted you more then anything." "Yeah I guess." Morgan said looking down at Reid's sleeping face. "I see the way you look at him Morgan, and don't deny it. I think you would be good for him." "Wow, I'd never thought you'd say that. I thought you said relationships would get in the way of the team?" "Well I thinks he needs someone to look after him now and I rather it be you then someone else." "Well thanks I guess…but Reid doesn't seem to be interested in me." "Damnit Derek just talk to him! You can't expect him to know what you're thinking!" "Good point."

After a few days Spencer was beginning to feel better. The withdrawals had subsided and he was feeling a lot better. Morgan had asked him out and he said yes, obviously with the same feelings. Morgan helped Spencer get over the drugs and everything was good again.

**END**

**This is just a story I wrote a while ago, I thought I should post it. Your imagination can do the rest if you want more.**


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